What would you do if you were in 5th grade again? What are the most important skills you should be learning in 5th grade?
The whole conversation started with Jayden making the comment and hugging me for teaching him to type.
I thought of a thing: Did her mom highlight this fact or it is more Jayden realizing this by himself with the help of school social validation?
Anyway. To answer Jayden’s questions I need to assess one question. If I did not do what I have done since fifth grade till now would I still be interested in what I am passionate about right now? The thought experiment is “Would I do what I do now if I did not do what I did?” I am not sure. If I had not met Fellipo one of my good friends who introduced me to the science Olympiads, I would not be this passionate about the STEM field. I’m not sure either. Since 5th grade, I had a curious mind about the WHYs of science. Maybe. I would still explore science.
For middle schoolers, I believe the most important skill is to develop an anti-fragile mindset. Basically growth mindset but understanding what it is. It is so easy to say I have a growth mindset but when we face hardship it is hard to implement a growth mindset and optimism.
I wish I worried less about how others thought of me and had alone time to reflect on what I truly want for my future. At Jayden’s age, it is the “like” and “dislike.” If that is what you like doing go do more of it! It is ok to explore at this age. Don’t listen to your mom saying: “Oooo so you lost those 3 years practicing piano then!!” It is so okay to do something and stop and say this does not feel like what I want to do for my future.
Overall, I wish I had the habit of journaling for 30 minutes in the morning cared less about what others think of me, and took jokes or even bullying less personally. If people make a joke related to your background just laugh along. It does not mean that you are not protecting where you come from but just do not ruin the social time. But also know that there is a time when we should fight for who we are.
Right now I am in a very interesting dilemma: Should I focus on the opportunities that arise or what I am truly passionate about right now and find the unconventional opportunity by putting more time and energy into it?
I Still Hate High School!
Went back to my high school today to visit. Entered just by giving them my ID. I received no instruction on my restrictions as an alum visitor of the school. I went up to the 2 floors to meet my very honored high school English Teacher and mentor. After our conversation, he escorted me down to the welcome center. They were supposed to have me be at the welcome center and get the visitor tag and have someone escort me to my English Teacher’s office but the security did not tell me shit. So I got the visitor tag and I said bye to the welcome center ladies. Then I talked around the school to find my track coach. On the way, I asked this white “security guard” where is my track coach located right now. He immediately started questioning me asking a bunch of questions as a usual oppressor. “Who are you?!” “What are you doing here?!” “Why are you walking around if you are not a student here?!” I did not get the chance to answer. He escorted me back to the front desk threatening me that I could get arrested right now because I was an intruder.
Ok, let me get a little emotional here. They did not potato give me the right instruction in my first stupid potato visit to my stupid potato high school. This stupid potato high school did not change. It is the old smashed potato oppressive system with a bunch of baked potatoes acting as if they are at the top of the hierarchy governing their little slave. I am a visitor and they still treated me like a smashed potato. I regret leaving without saying anything to that fried white security potato. “Like first of all, y’all did not give me the instruction that I cannot be walking around my old school. Plus, who are you to tell me and yell at me like that?!” Not even my mom will be yelling at me like that.” Would you treat your kids that way how do you treat the students here at this school?!” Will you be verbally abusing and threatening your kids to abide by arbitrary rules that do not make sense?”
I feel bad for the students inside. The universe blesses y’all. I hope y’all be liberated soon. This pedagogical system is not working. Kids are suffering severe restrictions, which is unbearable.
Gratitude
Grateful for my family. It was been a long time since I do not write gratitude for my family. Yeah, I am grateful for them. The whole thing of questioning that their love towards me was to provoke their thinking of the meaning of their parental love. I want them to express it because just taking action; thinking of our future; and paying a ton of money for our education. It was supposed to be a thought experiment for them to think: If I am financially independent of them and do not need anything from them anymore, how would they express love or they will just stop loving?
Family are great when you need them however they are always around when you do not need them too. Which is how Western families behave. They try to get into their children’s lives even for their marriage when they are 30 or 40. I guess for me I will let my kids be independent as soon as I see signs that they want to do things by themselves.
